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Guitar shop bullying

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I went to Allans Music Store today in search of an acoustic guitar. My Cort was never that good anyway, and one of the tuning things at the top has broken off, and I can’t tune my D-string anymore. It’s heartbreaking. I’m aiming to spend around $AU1000, and found a beautiful Maton for about $AU1100. I was only playing it for a few minutes, while the (really helpful but very nervous and apparently new) salesguy had gone off to help someone else. There’s little more enjoyable than playing with instruments way more expensive than you’re used to, and I was have a great time. Until another salesguy came along with two electric guitars. He said to me, “Sorry, mate, but can you help me with something?”

I nodded eagerly, because I always feel vaguely guilty for sitting there and playing their instruments. “Trying to tell the difference between these two guitars.” He proceeded to plug one in, turn the amp up loud and shred. I was suitably impressed, and listened to him jack off one guitar before he did the same with the other. I told him which sound I preferred, and then he repeated the procedure a total of three times and kept looking at me. I had no idea what I was supposed to say or do. I told him as much, and he said “The clarity! On the first pick-up!” as I sat their silent, sadly rubbing my now-beloved and now-silent Maton.

I had no idea if he was trying to annoy me or genuinely asking me because he thought I’d help. Thankfully my sales attendant came back and asked if I needed any help. The shredding guy was like “Oh, sorry, Paul.” And then turned the amp up louder and continued to meedleey-meedley his way up and down what ever pentatonic-mixolydian-minor-diminished (yeah, what?) scale he was playing. Paul gave me a look and we both walked off to talk somewhere else quieter. I’m still confused by it, but I think maybe it was some form of sales guy bullying? Kinda surreal.

Anyway, Paul said he’d match any price I find, so hopefully I’ll get that beautiful guitar for $1000. Speaking of acoustic guitars, here are three awesome clips of Queens of the Stone Age playing live acoustic versions of their new songs. Hopefully worth watching even for non-fans.


Written by atroche

April 22, 2008 at 11:46 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged with , , , ,

One Response

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  1. When you try out a guitar in a shop, the sales guy is always a mixture of Eddie Van Halen and Steve Vai. “I’ll just see if it’s in tune”, he’ll say before he begins to shred like the world’s greatest guitar player.

    Having releived himself, he hands the guitar back to you with a look that says, “I may have a mullet hair style, but beat that, sheep abuser!”

    As the traditional guitar shop is in decline due to the success of online retail, I sugest a line of humiliation DVDs with titles like “Start feeling selfconscious, worm!”, in order to recreate the whole guitar shop humiliation zeitgeist.

    Michael Reed

    April 29, 2008 at 7:16 am

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